Accomplishments
Throughout the history of The Humans, The Great Galoons, The Babimabas and best till last, The Crazy Apes. We have been a helping hand. We have meticulously subverted all known laws of physics, aviation and nature. We've racked up quite the penalty from the Department of Universal Matters and Bombardments (D.U.M.B). With over 20 trillion years worth of time to serve and more than ℵ0 doubloons owed to them, we are in a scarce situation of no-contentment and "shiver me timbers".
Despite our feeble past shenanigans with the rules of power, our knowledge has grown so far and so wide that the Gods elected us to become the new God. Even their power cannot apprehend us! Such formidable powers shan't be given to just any street schmuck! Only those of great will and perspicacity can perceive such higher intended delicacies and delights.
We would like to share some of those endeavours with you. If you would be as so kind to read below.
Creation of the worlds first Abortion Clinic / Pizza.
Reducing waste and giving taste since 1550 BCE.
"Your loss is our sauce"
El Morte Negro
Since 1346
Hosted;
The Octo Games
Created the tumble trouble in America
Discovery of Fie-ya!
Spoon balanced on nose for 10 seconds
Mastered the art of Cucumber growth.
Solved the well known "Mr hands" Case during 2005
Crown virus - slightly acidic, but prefers old people
2019
Fought in the battle of Babcarton on the seventh moon of Xyterra
Developed the cure for all diseases however withheld them to make profits.
Taught the ways of the wagdaddy during the east coastal frontal fight on the planet Triodders.
Announced the precipitate;
The Feacel Games
Discoved the following elements;
Polonium, Uranium, Urmumium, Francium and Astatine
High fived Dr Taylor Before his great sacrafice during the War between Ape Kind and The Munchmen
Can effortlessly catch grapes in our mouths
Developed the holes in every known donut using wormhole technology.
Employed of devilishly devious tactics to locate the "Shakespearean Ape"
-To banana or not to banana
29th February 1334
Wrote all literature ever, especially all known Shakepearian Literature. How do you think he wrote so well? 'twas because he had a massive, 3.14159265 inch genetical stimulation tether.
Founder the Sanitation Squad back in the 19's